Be Careful What You Watch …

So I’m pretty much in love with sitcoms both British and American. I have realised this is a major problem when it comes to meeting guys. I recently got asked for my number by a guy. He was a good looking, seemed friendly, and straight up asked me for my number. I should have been flattered and flirtatiously given him my number whilst batting my eyelashes. Instead my brain just shut down on me. All I could muster was “Ummm”.  I did eventually manage to get the numbers out that made up my number whilst turning a deeper shade of beetroot. As soon as I finished giving it to him, I rushed into the nearest bathroom to splash some water on my face and down a glass too. 
For this epic fail I hold people like Miranda Hart and the cast of Friends responsible. I recently watched an episode of Miranda, it was Series 2, Episode 1. I realised the way Miranda acted when she met a lovely hunky guy was pretty much my guy reaction. Whilst it makes for fantastic TV viewing, practical life advice not so much. 
And so you may ask what happened with me and said guy. Nothing, not a darn think. I wonder why???

Love Esmee Jayne xxx


Friday Fiction – The Toe and The Tap

A thought of a boiling hot bath had pretty much been the thing getting her through the day at work. She had to admit it had lived up to her expectations. Candles filled the room. Bubbles up to the rim at the bath. The scents of rose and lavender filled the steamy air. Gently she slipped in to the bath. The feeling of the hot water seeping into her cold muscles and frozen bones was heavenly. She let out a sigh of sheer relief and pleasure. 

She decided to slouch down a little further so the water could competent surround her aching shoulders. As she slid down her her toes emerged out of the water near the taps. As the water soothes her aching muscles, she began to use her big toe to circle the edge of the tap to rhythm over the background music. She couldn’t have been more relaxed. 

Then her toe slid off the edge of the tap which had become slippy with condensation and became stuck in the tap. In an instant her relaxed move vanished. She tried to sit up but couldn’t her leg was locked in his position. She tried wriggling but it didn’t get any looser. She even tried squirting soap at it but it just made more bubbles. She took a deep breath and figured she would just have to wait for help. Luckily she knew Handsome was on his way home.

“Hey!” She shouted as soon as she heard the door swing open.

“Hey Gorgeous.” Handsome smiled as he looked down on her “You’re in a right old pickle aren’t you?”

“Yes” Gorgeous retorted angrily. “I was going to cook you an amazing dinner but I’ve been stuck here all night and I’m freezing  even more than when I got in, please.”

With a bit of persuasion the tap released the toe. Handsome wrapped a thick fluffy dressing gown around Gorgeous and showered her with his specialty Cheese on Toast. Gorgeous learned the lesson to never surrender your toes to your taps when your in the bath. 

Singing Sentences

I tweeted the lovely Carole Matthews recently to tell her that my latest blog was all about her. I tweeted “@carolematthews it’s all about you” As I’m typing it I start singing the McFly song ‘It’s All About You’ in my head. So am I the only one that does this? When you hear or say or write a sentence that is a song lyric do you start singing the song? 

I love McFly their an awesome band but it’s not just limited to them. I was babysitting some kids the other day and sighed to myself and said “What time is it?” With that all three of them broke out singing “What Time Is It?” From High School Musical 2. Now I have to admit this is partially self inflicted as I did introduce them to High School Musical but I began to wonder if this is a universal thing. 

So for instance when some asks you “Do you remember?” do you mentally end it with “twenty first night of September” by Earth Wind and Fire. 

Or if your asking a little kid to “Hold My Hand” does Jess Glynn start swirling around your brain. 

I think my favourite would be if your significant other was to ask you “Do You Love Me?” And you replied “Cause I can really move” by the Contours. 

 Check out my playlist on songs you sing when you hear or say certain sentences

Defrosting the Perfect Moment

So at the start I said this blog was about writing but since then I have blogged about other people’s witting and music and just about everything else. So here it goes. All feedback is very welcome. 
We’d had an amazing last night, the memories came flooding back to me as my eyes flickered open. The sunlight is starting to creep in around the curtain. I just sighed with contentment. It seemed the perfect way to sum up my emotions. The sunlight is casting just enough light to give me a good view of the man laying next to me. I look across at my handsome fella. He’s still out for count. Heavily breathing lying face down on the pillow. I love just let watching his body rise and fall with his breathing. It’s a gentle rhythm. His blonde quiff from last night has gone all floppy. Without his shirt on his muscles look so defined. I could lie here and watch him all day. I wish I could freeze this perfect moment. 

However now I’m awake I have a pressing need to use the loo. Nothing like a full bladder to kill the mood. Now this is where I’m stuck. I mean literally stuck. Handsome has stretched his arm right across me and his hand is resting on the edge of the mattress. I don’t want to wake him up but I also don’t want a puddle in my bed. 

Think logically. Ignore the throbbing bladder and focus on the task at hand. I think shimmying under the arm is the best plan. I can then just slip out and slip back in. So the shimmying begins. I mean my legs were below his arm anyways. Everything else seems to slide under relatively seemlessly. Until we reach my head. No amount of squishing or bending is going to make that any smaller. I tired to carry on but my nose hit his forearm. My chin kept going my nose was stuck. My mouth was beginning to be forced open to bridge the gap. This isn’t going to work I thought. 

As I’m retreating my head back to the pillow, my nose has caught a waft of aftershave from last night from his arm. I’ve got to stifle a sneeze that’s coming. I quickly cross my legs to prevent anything escaping and bury my head in the pillow and let out a muffled achoo. I look over at Handsome who is still gently breathing in and out, undisturbed. I let out a small sigh of relief. Before long my pressing need to use the loo as occupying my thoughts. The situation is getting dire. 

Right it’s going to have to be shimmy upwards and lift my legs up and over. This was going to be seamless. So yet again the shimmying begins. “BANG” as I shimmy so violently my head bangs against the headboard. Not only do I have a pain in my bladder but I also have a pain in my head to match. As I glance over I’ve done the one thing I tried to avoid I woke Handsome. “Morning” he smiled at with a row of perfect teeth and big blue eyes. I wanted to stay but I had a more pressing need. 

I jumped out of bed and made a run for the bathroom. I didn’t care how much noise I made along the way.  I think I let out a few moans of pleasure. The feeling of relief was amazing. As I returned to Handsome who is still lying in bed looking perfect. “What was all that about?” He chuckled. 

“Sorry.” I signed. “I was trying not to wake you up but I really, really needed the loo.” 
“Well that didn’t work out did it? Why didn’t you want to wake me up? I’ve got to get up soon anyway.” Handsome asked. 

“When I woke up and got to watch you for a moment sleeping it just felt perfect and right and I didn’t want to ruin the moment.” I replied, feeling a little foolish. 

“So that’s why you were sniffing my arm then?” He chuckled. 

“You were awake the whole time then.” I said feigning outrage. 

“Yeah, well you see I usually wake up a bit before you because I love to watch you sleep. Your hair spread across the pillow, the way your mouth twitches, and how your eyelashes flutter when you wake up. Gorgeous.” Handsome smiled bashfully before he kissed me. 

I leaned in and kissed him back. As we’re embroiled in a kiss. I realise that watching him sleep wasn’t the perfect moment, but this right here and now was the perfect moment. This moment was the perfect moment that I wanted to freeze. 

Feeling Fluttery for Paper Hearts and Summer Kisses 

So one book you have to read this summer is Carole Matthews’ Paper Hearts and Summer Kisses. I have completely fallen in love with it. It will make laugh, cry and fall in love too. 

Being a massive Carole Matthews fan I was eager to gobble this up. If you haven’t read the Chocolate Lovers series I thoroughly recommend it (also have something to nibble on as those bold tend to make me a bit peckish) 

So we have the lovely Christie Chapman, she’s one of those characters you are just rooting for right from the start. You really want her to have a happy ending. She’s very ordinary in a lot of ways a single working mum trying hard to raise her teenage son, make ends meet and fall in love. Christie is a bit of a worrier which I can relate to. She worries about the problems that many of us worry about. Ordinary everyday life, family, love and loss. 

When the charming, handsome, dashing Max Alexander strolls in, well I have to say I think I have fallen in love with him. What would I give to have a guy like that stroll into my life. Christie’s parents are just adorable, they sound a little to good to be true. Then there’s Finn, a stereotypical teenage boy but a softer, soppier side is revealed. The fact that underneath the video game addict there is a boy that loves his mum very much. 

The thing that I love the most about this book is seeing an ordinary family go through something extraordinary. I think what tugged at my heart strings came from the dedication knowing that a real family had gone through it. 

The verdict: I think this a brilliant summer read. I would thoroughly recommend it with cocktails and a box of tissues on the side. 

Love Esmee Jayne xxx

Happy Days from the Overtones 

I’m so happy about the Overtones releasing their new happy EP entitled Happy Days, it just makes me happy! (I know I said Happy way too many times) I’m a mahoosive Overtones fan and have been gagging for new music since their last album in 2015. Last Friday we got the lovely EP Happy Days. It’s got a lovely vintage feel inspired by retro TV themes. 

Happy Days – This song cannot help but make you smile. It screams vintage. The harmonies on this track are amazing, even better than the original YouTube cover. It’s got a real Friday feeling about it and really shows off the guys voices. I also love the giggles at the end. If you don’t know what TV show this is from then shame on you, go and google it. 

Maybe Tomorrow – I recognised the song but didn’t know the TV. I love Lachie’s voice on this track. I found it really relaxing to listen to. Great if your feeling a bit stressed. The TV show looks quite sweet ‘The Littlest Hobo’ about a homeless dog that helps people. 

Cheers – I think for vocal arrangements this track has to be the best. You get to see each of the guys shine individually. I think that’s what’s given the Overtones their staying power is that they aren’t a boyband with a lead singer but five amazing vocalists with a delicate balance. Again if you don’t know what TV show this is from shame on you and go and google it. 

Thank You For Being A Friend- The guys have done this track live and it sounds great. It’s fab to finally have it released. I love the fact that it’s acapella it sounds even better. A perfect end to this little EP. The friendship these guys have is well summed up in this song. Not a fan of the Golden Girls myself but the song is great. 

I love this EP my only complaint is I need more! 

My Top 5 Things to do in Copenhagen

So whilst on my travels I hit Denmark. I went for Copenhagen. It’s a very historic city to immerse yourself in. You also get some amazing food in Denmark all of which must be tried. Papiroen – (Pronounced Papi- Rourn) It’s a fabulous street food festival you can get everything from traditional Danish Open Sandwiches, Barbeque Pulled Pork Rolls, French Duck Fat Chips, British Fish and Chips there’s even a entire stall dedicated to cheesecake. You are bound to find something you like there.

5) Rundetarn – Or the Round Tower in English. It offers great views over the city and also more history about King Gustav and Copenhagen. Also if you’ve started to tuck into Copenhagen delicacies the walk of 200 meters should burn it off. 

4) Christiansborg Castle – Denmark still has a very active royal family. There are lots of castles you can visit. This one currently houses the Houses of Parliament and is where royal functions such as the New Year Gala are held. It gives you a great overview of the royal family in Denmark

3) River Cruise – There are lots of company’s operating around the centre of Copenhagen. They take around some of the major sites in about an hour. You get to see things like the Little Mermaid Statue, Amalienborg Palace (the current residence of the Royals), The Old Denmark Stock Exchange.

2) Tivoli Gardens – An old amusement park in Copenhagen. It’s really pretty and a great place to visit. It’s one of the most well known sites in Copenhagen. There you have an assortment of rides and shows as well as bar and cafes to visit. 

1) Nyhavn – This is one place you can’t miss. Probably one of Copenhagens most well known sites is the colourful harbour. I would walk along the opposite side to really see it and take it in. Take advantage of the bars, restaurants and cafes alongside and soak up some atmosphere.


For me I found Copenhagen to be a city steeped in history and culture. You just have to go there to soak it up.


Love Esmee Jayne xxx

My Top 5 Things to do In Helsinki

Sorry the blog has been a little quiet of late but I’ve been busy out there experiencing life. I mean you’ve got to live to blog. Here are my top 5 things to do while your in Helsinki. I under estimated how pretty the city would be. It has some really beautiful buildings. It’s not the most cosmopolitan city but it is friendly. Ok here we go

5. Finnish Sauna – So I have to admit when I went to Finland this was pretty low on my list of things to hit. Having said that it is such a massive part of Finnish culture you just have to do it. Now for anyone who doesn’t know Finnish people like to have a sauna as a group all in the nude, no swimming costumes and no towels wrapped round you This is quite a culture shock. They just see it as perfectly normal, they do it from such a young age there is no shame in seeing anyone else starkers. For anyone from a more private culture like Britain it is quite something to get your head round. If you want to break yourself in gently book yourself into a private sauna either at your hotel or a private room at a public sauna. However if your feeling brave then jump right in and go for it in a public sauna. In Helsinki there is a nice sauna called Loyly with a sea pool to cool off in after. Either way at some point in your trip someone Finnish is going to ask you if you have been in a sauna so you can’t avoid forever

4. Beach – Now obviously this is assuming that it is warm and your visit in summer. There is a lovely beach just outside the town Porvoo. It is quite small but has toilets, a fire pit area to host a bbq and changing cubicles. It’s located on the edge of forest. It’s very peaceful not overlooked as in front of you are more forests. Some sections of the beach are privately owned so be careful you do t wander onto someone else’s patch.

3. Porvoo – It is one of Finland’s oldest towns. It is steeped in history. Has lots of cute boutique style shops if your looking for more quirky souvenirs. There are lots of bus trips regularly run out there. It is most famous for some red houses which sit on the edge of the river. These are known as spice houses because they were where all imported spices and salt would go through before being sold. Some of these are now houses and some are restaurants. I would thoroughly recommend trying one of the restaurant on the riverbank, the views and atmosphere are very relaxing.

2. Helsinki Town Centre – Surprisngly Helsinki town centre is quite small. Here you will find probably the most well known image of Helsinki the White Church. It’s very impressive to look at, including its immense square. There are also plenty of shops, restaurants and cafes to explore.

1. Summolina – This has to be my favourite thing that I did in Finland. It’s an old naval base off the coast of Helsinki. Plenty of boats run their regularly. I would advise visiting in an evening. Seeing the sunset from their is stunning.

So that’s my round up from Helsinki, I had a fab time there and I would thoroughly recommend it to anyone.

Love Esmee Jayne xxx

Writing Inspiration

Everyone gets an occasional attack of writers block. I’ve learned that it’s just getting away from writing and doing a bit of observing tends to bring the spark back.

At the moment I’m going away on holiday and found that observing people whilst travelling has been a massive help. Your travels and just things that happen in everyday life can give you inspiration just when you need it.

Yesterday I had the journey from hell. I caught a train to London, which was delayed for 3 hours. Only after we were 2 hours late did we get a complimentary tea or coffee. Then there was the threat of the train being terminated a stop earlier, leaving me stranded in another town.

Finally got to London later than planned, heading into the Tube for the final leg of the journey. Heading on to the escalator I pull the suitcase and the handle snaps. So my suitcase it at the bottom of the escalator being picked up by some very lovely people. I’m now doing the running man trying to get back to the bottom of the escalator to my suitcase.


Safe to say it wasn’t my night last night, but as I was lying there around midnight desperately trying to get some sleep in a stifling room in London extremely aware that I had to get up in four hours to catch my flight, I can the but laugh I think this would make a hilarious chapter in a book. You never know you might just read all about it one day but you know where you heard it first.


Inspiration can come from the unlikeliest of places. Share yours with me!


Great British Menu

I’ve been a fan of the Great British Menu for a few years. It’s a bit different from your average cooking show. You get to see great chefs cook, see them sweat and stress for a change. Then see them pull it altogether with innovative presentation for a themed banquet.



The theme this year was summer and Wimbledon. The final selections for this year, I didn’t completely agree with them. Kicking off the banquet was Pip Lacey with Whatever the Weather. I loved the presentation on this one. Especially the interactivity with the tomoato rain. Everyone who tasted said she had amazing light summer flavours.

Then there was Tommy Banks who cooked Toubot with Strawberries and Cream. I loved the idea of putting strawberries and cream in the fish course but overall I think preferred Tom Browns fish course.

I was so pleased to see Scottish chef Michael  Bremner get a place on this banquet. The Grass is Greener was very different. It is unusual  to see something like tounge on the menu but it did look succulent. It was great to see Michael get some recognition.

Then rounding it off was Selin Kiazim with Honouring Venus Rosewater Champions. It looked classy and elegant. The perfect end to a perfect banquet.

Until next year then.


Love Esmee Jayne xxx